Falling in love…


Over the past few days I have been asked the question “What are you doing to your hair?” Apart from the irritation that comes after the first five inquisitions into my hair life, I didn’t particularly like these interrogations because truth is I don’t know what it is exactly that I am doing with my hair. But I’m willing to find out where it ends.

On Thursday last week I made an active decision to begin a relationship with my hair. Itai will probably use this as proof that I am obsessed with my hair (Itai being my office lesser half) and maybe he’s partially right:) but it goes deeper than that. As little girls, thanks to a lot of hair-tugging and pulling on Sundays, most of us (here in reference to those of us with so-called nappy-hair) come to the conclusion that our hair is “unmanageable.”

And so came the years of relaxers that soon wore me out I went “natural” which coincided with  Convent finally allowing braids. Which saved me the headache of having to face my hair for a long period of time. I told myself I would wear it with nothing else after high school, but then I joined the wonderful working world.

Not only did this mean I didnt have a lot of time to spend on “discovering” my hair, I also felt highly uncomfortable wearing my own hair. Though no one at work ever tells you natural hair is “unprofessional” you will pick it up from subtle comments such as “Your hair is looking very natural today.”

But I can’t take it anymore, “Faking the natural”, as someone once aptly put it. Feeling highly superior to all your friends who choose to go the other routes yet at least they have courage enough to go all the way with their choice. But as long as I keep looking for ways to make my life easier without ever trying to just live with my hair, I am faking being natural.

So on Thursday 26 September I promised myself that I will start listening to my hair. I already know that it loves water (very soft when its moisturized) !debunking the myth that you should never let you hair get wet unless its necessary. (no more panicking every time it rains and I have no umbrella)  I’m still trying to figure out which hairstyles are time effective since I don’t have much time to dedicate to my hair during the week and I also trimmed my hair recently (sigh) so the styles have to work for my now shorter hair.

Occasionally I do have one person who says something that really has me on cloud nine. One girl even told me I should start a hair blog but right now am not read for such a commitment All in all I can’t wait to see what will come out of my little hair experiment. I guess whoever wants to know what I am doing with my hair, I got three words; “Falling in love”


4 comments on “Falling in love…

  1. Chanda says:

    I finally decided to do away with the fake too. Hard. But as you most aptly put it (and thank-you for that) am falling in love with this shoooooort, black mass on my head. its a shame that the black mind has become so accustomed to our feeble attempts to imitate our white sister that I am constantly having to address the question (asked, annoyingly, in a ah-shame-poor-girl manner) “ko what happened to your hair?”, even from the brothers, they too have had their eyes conditioned to see as beautiful only the plastic threads entwined with and covering the gorgeous kink with which she was divinely indued.

    What happened to my hair? MY hair? Shame, this girl today even said to me after I had pointed out, as am always doing now, that my hair was still on my head, “no I mean the real one”. !!!! WHAT?!!!!! Pity the Black woman

    • Gwen says:

      Truly pity her. The worst part of it is that we are often blind (purposely or not) to the fact that all we are doing is aspiring to have white, or Indian or Chinese hair. You’ll hear people say “I’m comfortable with my hair. Its just that I like how hassle free and versatile my hair is.”

  2. tawa says:


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